succeed-how we can reach our goals?(PART ONE)
从2017年10月3号到11月17号，利用每天30min-1小时，我读完了人生中的第一本原版书：《succeed-how we can reach our goals》by Heidi Ph.D.学习英语无数年，却总也学不好，电影离不开字幕，听力离不开文本，越学越有失败感。学不会？直接拿来用！当我读完一本原版书并习得知识时，不禁拍大腿：英语真的只是工具。读原版书，是利用英语打开眼界获得国外名家思想的最佳途径，没有之一。
这本原版书告诉我，be-better type;think what not only think why;the benefits of prevention mindness;re-define change,mistake,temptation
Decide where you are going. How you set your goals?How you will get there?Success is more likely when you focus on the right details, in the right way.
Do not tell someone "do your best",which will just make the person do a "good enough" job,a job that is far from the best. Set specific,challenging goals.This will increase people's satisfaction,commitment and confidence,which leads them to challenge themselves more.
After finishing testing, I find myself a person who tends to think about my own behavior in more ABSTRACT term---I describe the things I do by focusing on WHY I am doing it.
Sweep the floor=keep the house clean
On the other hand,people who tends to think about their behavior in more concrete terms.They describe their goal in terms of "what they are doing " .
Sweep the floor-collect the dust and trash it away.
Both abstract-why(big picture/meaning/purpose) and concrete-what(nitty gritty) ways of thinking about your behaviour have pros and cons.The trick is to adjust your thinking according to your circumstances---when to think why and when to think what.
If you want to motivate someone, or when you are doing something easy and familiar,or when you want to enhance your self-control(say not eat the chocolate), think why.
When you need to do somehting that is difficult,unfamilar,complex,learning a new skill,think what(the actual mechanics of getting from point A to point B)
Conclusion:Shift your thinking style to match the goals you want to achieve.Use the optimal one.
Attention:when you might unconscioulsy be biased toward on kind of thinking,which is not suitable for your goal.
How long it will be before you start to execute your plan?Most of us are biased to think about more distant future plans in more abstract-why terms;on the other hand, near future plans tend to be more concrete-what to do to GTD terms.
Why thinking leads us to pay more attention on "desirability"information-How fun,pleasant,rewarding,succesful,rich,wonderful it will be?And we primarily tend to think about and answer these questions.If the answers are yes, then you would probably adopt that goal.
What thinking leads us to pay more attention on "feasibility"information-what needs to be done?How likely are we to succeed?what's the obstacles?
When you decided your goal in the future distant, you were thinking why.You didn't spend that much time thinking about whether or not you could make it work.We are biased to think about future events more in terms of why(we want to do them) and less what(how we'll get it done?)We adopt goals that potentially rich rewards that are actually logistically nightmares.It explains that why many of us find ourselves struggling to juggle all the goals we thought we'd have enough time for.
On the other hand, we focus too much on what,not enough why for the spur-of-the-moment chance to do something fun and rewarding in the near future.
How to do?Recognize the trade-offs.Time spent on doing one thing means time not spent doing another for both near and future planning.
Be more realistic about your time and to prevent procrastinate, think what.
Illusory superiority tells us that most of us believe we are above average, that we are more likely to have good things to happen than our peers and less likely to have bad things to happen.
Direct positive thinking in the right way.The optimal strategy when setting a goal is think positively about how it will be when you achieve your goal,while thinking realistically abuot what it will take to get there.Mental contrasting-consider both what you want and what stands in your way, will give your the clarity to make decision.
In a nutshell,no matter who you are and what you are trying to do, it's important to have confident that you will eventually succeed,but are equally confident that we will have a tough time getting there.This can motivate us to take extra effort how we will deal with problems before they arise.
When you believe you can succeed,use mental contrasting(happy ending of your goal VS. the obstacle that stands between you and your happy ending......).This leads to greater effort,energy,planning and thus higher rate of achieving goals.
Belief:
Believe you can get better:
Whether or not you think you can get ability matters.Intelligence,smartness,athletic prowess is not something fixed.It's malleable.It can be developed over time through practise and learning.
Environment:
Most of goals you are pursuing are operated entirely without your awareness.We work best when as much of what we are doing can be delegated to the unconscious mind as possible.The more we do something,the more automatic it becomes.
Cues,say words,slogan,image,people in your environment can be a trigger.So you can set up the right environment.Make your unconscious work for you.
扩展阅读：how deep is your love ... plays a less key role ... hollow grove ... she stood there ... how to success in life ... wer colourbars displayed ... we all went swimming ... i had to buy a new one ... choosing a right career ...
