小品,三人女生表演，求大神给编个小品或者相声，简单的不要太长。搞笑的。 高分急求搞笑小品或者相声剧本要三人的 不要道具太复杂的 要爆...
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\u4e19\uff1a\u4ec0\u4e48\u4e71\u4e03\u516b\u7cdf\u7684\u3002\u5f97\u4e86\uff0c\u586b\u7b2c\u4e8c\u680f\u5427\u3002
\u7532\uff1a\u7b2c\u4e8c\u680f\u662f\u6027\u522b\u3002
\u4e59\uff1a\u8fd9\u4f60\u603b\u4e0d\u4f1a\u586b\u9519\u4e86\u5427\u3002
\u7532\uff1a\u53ef\u8001\u5e08\u8bf4\u53c8\u586b\u9519\u4e86\u3002
\u4e59\uff1a\u554a\uff0c\u4f60\u4e0d\u4f1a\u586b\u6210\u7537\u7684\u4e86\u5427?!
\u7532\uff1a\u4e0d\u4f1a\u4e0d\u4f1a\uff0c\u6211\u586b\u7684\u662f\u201c\u5047--\u5c0f--\u5b50\u201d!
\u4e59\uff1a\u554a\uff0c\u5047\u5c0f\u5b50\u4e5f\u7b97\u6027\u522b?
\u7532\uff1a\u8fd9\u53ef\u662f\u6211\u5988\u8bf4\u7684(\u624b\u53c9\u8170\uff0c\u5b66\u5988\u5988\u7684\u53e3\u6c14)\u4f60\u5440!\u4e0d\u662f\u4e2a\u5973\u7684\uff0c\u6574\u4e2a\u5047\u5c0f\u5b50!
\u4e59\uff1a\u6211\u770b\u5450\uff0c\u4f60\u5988\u5728\u751f\u4f60\u7684\u65f6\u5019\uff0c\u5c31\u628a\u4f60\u7684\u6027\u522b\u7ed9\u641e\u9519\u4e86\u3002
\u7532\uff1a\u6240\u4ee5\u201c\u51fa\u8eab\u201d\u8fd9\u4e00\u680f\u5c31\u4e0d\u597d\u586b\u5566\u3002
\u4e19\uff1a\u51fa\u8eab\uff0c\u6307\u7684\u662f\u4f60\u51fa\u751f\u5728\u4ec0\u4e48\u6837\u7684\u5bb6\u5ead\u2026\u2026
\u7532\uff1a\u4e0d\u5bf9\u4e0d\u5bf9\uff0c\u6211\u4e0d\u662f\u5728\u5bb6\u91cc\u51fa\u751f\u7684\uff0c\u6211\u662f\u5728\u533b\u9662\u51fa\u751f\u7684\u3002
\u4e19\uff1a\u9519\u4e86!
\u7532\uff1a\u5bf9\u5bf9\u5bf9\uff0c\u662f\u9519\u4e86\uff0c\u6211\u8fd8\u5c11\u586b\u4e86\u51e0\u4e2a\u5b57\uff0c\u5e94\u8be5\u586b\uff1a\u5728\u5e02\u4eba\u6c11\u533b\u9662\u5987\u4ea7\u79d1\u51fa\u751f\uff0c\u7531\u5f20\u5927\u592b\u63a5\u751f\u3002
\u4e19\uff1a\u505c\u505c\u505c\uff0c\u4f60\u8d8a\u626f\u8d8a\u8fdc\u4e86\u3002\u51fa\u8eab\uff0c\u5c31\u662f\u95ee\u4f60\u4eec\u5bb6\u91cc\u4eba\u662f\u5e72\u4ec0\u4e48\u7684\u3002
\u7532\uff1a\u54e6\uff0c\u8fd9\u6211\u4f1a\u586b\uff1a\u5988\u5988\u6253\u9ebb\u5c06\uff0c\u7238\u7238\u7092\u80a1\u7968\uff0c\u5976\u5976\u7ec3\u6c14\u529f\uff0c\u7237\u7237\u8f66\u9a6c\u70ae\u3002
\u4e19\uff1a\u5662\uff0c(\u80f8\u524d\u5212\u5341\u5b57)\u6211\u7684\u4e0a\u5e1d\u5440\u3002\u5f97\u4e86\u586b\u4e0b\u4e00\u680f\u5427\u3002
\u7532\uff1a\u4e0b\u4e00\u680f\u8fd8\u662f\u586b\u51fa\u751f\u3002
\u4e59\uff1a\u521a\u624d\u4e0d\u662f\u586b\u8fc7\u4e86\u5417?\u600e\u4e48\u53c8\u586b\u51fa\u751f\u5450?
\u7532\uff1a\u8fd9\u56de\u586b\u7684\u662f\u51fa\u751f\u65f6\u95f4\u3002
\u4e59\uff1a\u54e6\uff0c\u51fa\u751f\u5e74\u6708\u65e5\u3002\u90a3\u4f60\u95ee\u7238\u7238\u5988\u5988\u554a?
\u7532\uff1a\u53ef\u4ed6\u4eec\u8bf4\u7684\u4e0d\u4e00\u6837\u3002
\u4e59\uff1a\u6709\u4ec0\u4e48\u4e0d\u540c?
\u7532\uff1a\u6211\u7238\u8bf4\u621191\u5e74\u751f\uff0c\u53ef\u6211\u5988\u786c\u8bf4\u621190\u5e74\u751f\u3002
\u4e59\uff1a\u7236\u6bcd\u53ef\u80fd\u8bb0\u9519\u4e86\uff0c\u90a3\u4f60\u518d\u95ee\u95ee\u7237\u7237\u5976\u5976\u3002
\u7532\uff1a\u53ef\u7237\u7237\u8bf4\u6211\u5143\u6708\u751f\uff0c\u5976\u5976\u8bf4\u6211\u814a\u6708\u751f\u3002
\u4e59\uff1a\u90a3\u4f60\u518d\u95ee\u95ee\u5916\u516c\u3001\u5916\u5a46\u3002
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\u4e59\uff1a\u54c7!\u4f60\u597d\u5e78\u798f\u554a!\u4e00\u5e74\u80fd\u8fc7\u8fd9\u4e48\u591a\u751f\u65e5\uff0c\u538b\u5c81\u94b1\u80af\u5b9a\u4e0d\u4f1a\u5c11\u3002
\u7532\uff1a\u5509!\u4ed6\u4eec\u4e00\u4e2a\u8bf4\u9633\u5386\uff0c\u4e00\u4e2a\u8bf4\u9634\u5386\u3002
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1、一个女生前一天晚上得到男朋友的订婚戒指，但竟没有一个同学注意到，令她忿忿不平。到下午大家坐着谈天的时候，她突然站起来大声说：“哎呀，这里真热呀，我看我还是把戒指脱下来吧。” 2、女主人把女佣叫到面前问她：“你是否怀孕了？” “是啊！”女佣回道。 “亏你还说得出口，你还没有结婚，难道不觉得害羞吗？”女主人再次训。 “我为什么要害羞，女主人你自己不也怀孕了吗？” “可是我怀的是我丈夫的！”女主人生气地反驳。 “我也是啊！”女佣高兴地附和。 3、一个人骑摩托车喜欢反穿衣服，就是把口子在后面扣上，可以挡风。一天他酒后驾驶， 翻了，一头栽在路旁。警察赶到： 警察甲：好严重的车祸。 警察乙：是啊，脑袋都撞到后面去了。 警察甲：嗯，还有呼吸，我们帮他把头转回来吧。 警察乙：好.....一、二使劲，转回来了。 警察甲：嗯，没有呼吸了....... 4、在一条七拐八拐的乡村公路上，因为时常发生车祸，所以常常有一些鬼故事发生，有一天晚上，有一个出租车司机看见路边有一个长发披肩，身着白衣的女人向他招手，因为这个司机没有见过鬼，所以大胆的停下来让她上车了，这一路上,司机虽然不信有鬼，心里也毛毛的，所以时常从后视镜看后面的女人，开着开着，突然司机发现那个女人不见了！司机吓了一大跳，赶紧踩了一个刹车！只见那个女人满脸是血，表情狰狞。司机吓的牙直打颤。突然那女人开口了：“你会不会开车啊！我低头系个鞋带你突然一刹车我把鼻子都撞破了……” 5、一个病人去看病，医生检查了他，皱着眉头说：“您病得太严重了，恐怕不会活多久了。” 病人：“求您告诉我我还能活多久？” 医生：“十……” 病人着急地问：“十什么？十年？？十个月？？？十天？？？？？” 医生：“十，九，八，七，六，五……” 6、老师：“你能说一些18世纪科学家共同特点吗？” 学生：“能，他们都死了。” 7、犀粪蜣和蚊子谈恋爱，蜣问蚊子是做什么工作的，蚊子说：“护士，打针的。”蜣一拍大腿：“缘分呐，我是中药局搓药丸的…” 8、一非洲人住在某一宾馆。夜半，起火，不明原因。非洲人见状顾不了那么许多，光着身子就跑出去了。消防员见状惊呼：“我的妈呀！都烧的糊了吧区的了还能跑那么快！” 9、一个人想出国考察，但必须得到老总批准。于是他向老总请示，老总给了他一张字条，上面写着：“Go ahead”。 那人想：“Go ahead=前进，老总是批准了。”于是他开始打点行李。 一个同事见到了他问：“你在做什啊？？”他说：“我准备出国考察，老总批准了，给我写了‘Go ahead’。” 同事一见条就乐了：“咱们老总根本就没批准！！咱老总的英语水平你还不知道，他这是在说去个头！” 10、牧师对买了他马和马车的农夫说：“这匹马只能听懂教会的语言，叫"感谢上帝"它就跑;叫"赞美上帝"它才停下。”农夫将信将疑，他试着喊了一声感谢上帝，那匹马立刻飞奔起来，越跑越快。一只跑到悬崖边上惊恐的农夫才想起让它停下来的口令“赞美上帝”。果然，马停下来了。死里逃生的农夫长出一口气：“感谢上帝………”
我打了很久，请采纳
1 the night before, a girl get boyfriend engagement ring, but no one noticed the classmate, make her antics. You sit and chat in the afternoon, she suddenly stood up and shouted: \"oh, it's really hot in here, I think I'd better take off your ring.\" 2, the mistress called the maid to ask her: \"are you pregnant?\" \"Yes!\" The maid answered. Export \"kui you still say, you are not married, don't you feel shy?\" The hostess training again. \"Why should I be shy, you don't the hostess also pregnant?\" \"But I conceive is my husband!\" The hostess retorted angrily. \"Me too!\" The maid happy to echo. 3, a man riding a motorcycle like the dress, is to cut on the back, can the wind. Drunk driving one day, he turned over, a planted on the road. Police: police a: a good serious car accident. Policeman b: yes, his head hit the back. Po1: well, still breathing, let's help him turn his head back. Po2: good... One, two, turn back. Policeman a: well, not breathing... 4, turn in a curvy country road, because often in a car accident, so often have some ghost story, one night, there's a taxi driver saw the side of the road have a long hair shawls, dressed in a white woman waved to him, because the driver didn't see a ghost, so bold stopped to let her get on the bus, along the way, the driver doesn't believe in ghosts, the in the mind also maomao, so often the woman behind the rearview mirror to see, open open, the driver found the woman suddenly disappeared! The driver startled, hurriedly stepped on a brake! I saw the woman face is blood, grim expression. The driver frighten of teeth chatter. Suddenly the woman spoke: \"would you drive! I bow to fasten shoelaces are you smashed through a sudden brake my nose...\" 5, a patient to see a doctor, the doctor examined him, frowning said: \"you too serious ill, I'm afraid I won't live much longer.\" Patient: \"please tell me how long will I live?\" Doctor: \"ten...\" Patient anxiously asked: \"what? Ten years?? Ten months??? Ten days?????\" Doctor: \"ten, nine, eight, seven, six, five...\" 6, teacher: \"can you say some 18 th-century scientists common characteristics?\" Student: \"yes, they are all dead.\" 7, rhino poop Qiang and mosquito fall in love, Qiang asked a mosquito is to do what work, the mosquito said: \"nurse, give or take an injection.\" Qiang a clap a thigh: \"the fate, I am a traditional Chinese medicine bureau rub pills...\" 8, the africans live in a hotel. In the midnight, a fire, unknown reason. Before rushing so many africans, naked and ran out. Firefighters said exclaimed: \"my mama ah! All paste the burned area can run so fast!\" 9, a person wants to go abroad, but it must be approved by boss. So he to the manager for instructions, the boss gave him a note, it read: \"Go ahead\". The man thought, \"Go ahead = progress, boss is approved.\" So he started to packing. A colleague to see he asked: \"what are you doing?\" He said: \"I'm ready to Go abroad investigation, boss approved, wrote me 'Go ahead'.\" Colleague of joy at the sight of article: \"let's boss haven't approved!!!!! Our boss English don't you know, he is said to head!\" 10, priests to buy his horse and carriage of the farmer said, \"this horse can only understand the language of the church, call\" thank god \"it ran; called\" praise god \"it didn't stop.\" Farmer track, he tried to thank god gave a cry, the horse gallop, immediately ran faster and faster. A run to the edge of the cliff frightened farmer remembered that let it stop password \"praise god\". Sure enough, the horse stopped. Close the farmer grows a sigh: \"thank god.........\"
I played for a long time, please
我们是三头小猪猪......
绛旓細1銆佷竴涓濂崇敓鍓嶄竴澶╂櫄涓婂緱鍒扮敺鏈嬪弸鐨勮濠氭垝鎸囷紝浣嗙珶娌℃湁涓涓悓瀛︽敞鎰忓埌锛屼护濂瑰靠蹇夸笉骞炽傚埌涓嬪崍澶у鍧愮潃璋堝ぉ鐨勬椂鍊欙紝濂圭獊鐒剁珯璧锋潵澶у０璇达細鈥滃搸鍛锛岃繖閲岀湡鐑憖锛屾垜鐪嬫垜杩樻槸鎶婃垝鎸囪劚涓嬫潵鍚с傗2銆佸コ涓讳汉鎶婂コ浣ｅ彨鍒伴潰鍓嶉棶濂癸細鈥滀綘鏄惁鎬瀛曚簡锛熲濃滄槸鍟婏紒鈥濆コ浣ｅ洖閬撱傗滀簭浣犺繕璇村緱鍑哄彛锛屼綘杩樻病鏈夌粨濠...
绛旓細灏忕幉:鎴戝啀缁欎綘浠嚭涓閬撻鍎;璇,浠婂ぉ鑰冭瘯浜,璋佹病鏉? 灏忚壘:浠婂ぉ鑰冭瘯璋佽兘涓嶆潵?灏忕幉? 灏忕幉:鎴戜笉鍦ㄥ憿涔! 灏忚壘:鐪嬬湅鍥涘懆,灏忎紞? 灏忎紞:鍦ㄥ憿! 灏忚壘:鍟!鎴戠煡閬撲簡鈥斺斿皬鑹! 灏忎紞:浣犳槸鐧芥潵浜!鏉ヤ簡璺熸病鏉ヨ繕涓嶄竴涓粨鏋! 灏忕幉:绛,鑰佸笀鍛!杩樻病鏉ュ憿! 鑰佸笀璧拌繘鏉ャ 涓変汉鍚撲竴璺:鏉ュ暒?鎬庝箞璇翠笉鏉ュ氨鏉ヤ簡鍛?鍝庡憖!(...
绛旓細鎴戠湅銆婃鏋楀浼犮嬫尯鍚堥 浣熸箻鐜夛紝绉鎵嶏紝灏忛儹锛屽ぇ鍢达紝鑰佸垜锛岃佺櫧 涓崍銆傚鏍堝唴銆傛箻鐜夛細绉鎵嶏紝鎶婅繖涓ゅぉ鐨勫笎缁欐垜鐪嬩竴涓嬨傜鎵嶏細甯愶紝鎵璋撳笎锛屽瓙鏇剧粡鏇拌繃鈥︹︽箻鐜夛細鍒洶鏇颁簡锛屼氦甯愶紒绉鎵嶏紙绱у紶鎸囧眿鍐咃級锛氭帉鏌滅殑鈥︹︾數鑴戔︹﹀ぇ鍢粹︹︾綉娓糕︹﹀笎鈥︹︽箻鐜夛細浣犵‘瀹氫竴瀹氫互鍙娾︹﹀皬閮細浠ュ強鑲畾銆傜鎵嶏細鎴...
绛旓細璧垫湰灞卞ぇ鍙旂殑鍗栨嫄銆傚崠杞︺傝繖閮藉彲浠ャ傜湅浣犱滑婕旀妧濡備綍銆備笉杩囨湁涓汉瑕佸弽涓层傝繖鏍疯繕鍙互澧炲姞鏇村鐨勬悶绗戞晥鏋溿
绛旓細璧垫湰灞憋細缁欐垜鏉ョ闈㈡潯 take me a bowl of noodles.灏忔矆闃筹細78鍏冧竴纰 78 yuan.姣涙瘺 :do you have the cheaper?灏忔矆闃: this is the cheapest,璧垫湰灞:ok ,please 灏忔矆闃: here is the noodle 姣涙瘺锛氱埛鐖锋湁涓鐐瑰捀浜,it's a bit salty. I want to drink coffee 璧垫湰灞憋細缁欏ス鎼炰竴纰楃櫧寮姘,...
绛旓細璐惧啺锛氫汉鎵嶅憖锛屽ぉ澶╀綔鎶ュ憡锛屽挴鍜搾锛屼笅铔嬪憿锛佷笉鏄尯濞佷弗涓涓箍鍛婏紝鎬庝箞缁欎綘鏁寸殑鎬庝箞鍍忥紝鍍忚烦澶х浼肩殑銆傚挶浠叕鍙告槸涓疄骞插瀷鐨勪紒涓氥傜帇绉樹功锛氭槸銆傝淳鍐帮細浣犳暣澶╂暣閭ｄ簺铏氬ご鍏剳鐨勶紝骞蹭粈涔堢帺鎰忥紝澶╁ぉ鎶ュ憡鎶ュ憡锛岄偅鎼炴湁閭ｄ箞濂界湅鍛紝鎶ュ暐鍛锛佺帇绉樹功锛氳淳鎬伙紝杩欏洖涓嶄竴鏍凤紝杩欏洖鏄幙棰嗗浜茶嚜涓婂挶浠叕鍙告潵鍚綘...
绛旓細甯冩櫙锛氫竴寮犺妗岋紝涓夊妗屾 浜虹墿锛氭暀甯 瀛︾敓鏉ㄤ簩涓 瀛︾敓鏉庝唬濞 瀛︾敓闄堝Ξ 闄堝敱锛氬挶鑰佺櫨濮擄紝浠婂効鐪熼珮鍏粹︹︼紙涓婂満鍒板骇浣嶏級 鏉庡敱锛氬お闃冲綋绌虹収锛岃姳鍎垮绗戔︹ 鏉ㄨ锛氭槰澶滆タ椋庡噵纰ф爲锛屽垰涓嬪眰妤硷紝鏀剧溂涓嶈姹傚璺 褰撯︹︼紙璋佸憖锛燂級寮犳儬濡 鏉細鍝庯紝鐗瑰ぇ鏂伴椈锛岀壒澶ф柊闂伙紒鐝换鍙堣鍜辨皵璺戜簡...
绛旓細骞介粯灏忓搧: 銆婅瘎濂栭娉 鍒涗綔:閭瑰畻鑽ｅ叕鍙稿勾浼氫笓鐢ㄥ墽鏈綔鍝佷富棰:閫氳繃灞曠幇涓涓崟浣嶅勾缁堝伐浣滄荤粨,鏈変汉浼告墜瑕佸鍜屾湁浜轰富鍔ㄩ鍔熺殑鎼炵瑧鍦洪潰,鍙嶅簲褰撲粖绀句細浜轰滑姹傚叕寮銆佽鍏銆佺浖鍏钩鐨勬皯涓绘剰璇,涔熸姌灏勫嚭鍦ㄥ悕鍒╅潰鍓嶄袱绉嶄笉鍚岀殑鎬濇兂澧冪晫鍜岃崳瑾夎銆備汉鐗╄瀹:4浜,涓ょ敺涓ゅコ銆傜帇涓讳换(鐢)鈥斺斿崟浣嶉瀵(濡傛灉鏄紒涓氬彲鏀圭О鐜嬫);...
绛旓細涓変汉锛氳鍚с 鍥㈡敮涔︼細浣犱滑鍚笉鍚晩锛 涓変汉锛氬惉鐫鍛紒 鍥㈡敮涔︼細鐪熺殑鍚紵 涓変汉锛氱湡鐨! 鍥㈡敮涔︼細纭畾锛 涓変汉锛氱‘瀹氥 鍥㈡敮涔︼細涓嶅弽鎮旓紵 涓変汉锛氫笉鍙嶆倲銆 鍥㈡敮涔︼細浣犱滑鏄鐪熺殑锛熸病楠楁垜锛 涓変汉锛氫綘璇翠笉璇村晩锛 鍥㈡敮涔︼細鍣紝鎴戝紑濮嬭浜嗭紒---鎴戣璇翠粈涔堟潵鐨勶紵 涓変汉鏅曞掋 ...
绛旓細鐖卞浗灏忓搧銆婂叆鍏氥嬬敺锛氭垜鏄釜鑰佸厷鍛樹簡锛屼笉锛屾柊鍏氬憳銆傛垜鏄釜浜斿崄鍥涘瞾鐨勮侀潚骞淬備粖澶╁姞鍏ヤ簡浼熷ぇ鐨勪腑鍥藉叡浜у厷锛屽湪椴滅孩鐨勫厷鏃椾笅搴勪弗澶х殑涓浗鍏变骇鍏氾紝鍦ㄩ矞绾㈢殑鍏氭棗涓嬪簞涓ュ瑾 瀹炵幇浜嗚拷姹傚崐鐢熺殑涓涓悊鎯炽傚晩鈥斺斿コ锛氳佸叕锛屼腑濂栦簡鍜嬬殑锛熺灖浣犺繖楂樺叴鐨勩傜敺锛氳佸﹩锛屼腑濂栨垜鑳借繖涔堥珮鍏村悧锛熸垜鏄叆鍏氫簡銆傜敺锛氬浠婃垜...
