有哪些英语话剧搞笑剧本，适合八个人出演的？ 急需英语搞笑话剧剧本 8人组的
\u6025\u6c42\u82f1\u8bed\u8bdd\u5267\u5267\u672c\u641e\u7b11\u7684 8\u4ebaNet Friend \u4e92\u8054\u7f51\u4ea4\u53cb
Summary:
Is it correct to make friends on the Internet? Will it be dangerous? Bill, Hillary's younger brother, is a rude and impolite boy. Everyone in his school doesn't like him. However, he really wants to have a girlfriend, so he asks his sister to help him. Then Hillary pretended to be Bill on net and met a nice girl, Monica. Three months later, Hillary asked Monica to go out with "Bill" (Her brother), and arranged everything for them. When they met each other at McDonald's, Monica found that Bill wasn't the one who she talked to on net. Then...
Finally, Monica understands that it's very dangerous to date with strangers and trusts everything of which her net-friend told her. And we all should be very careful when we're on net.
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Scene I
(In school cafeteria, students are having lunch)
Bill: Hey, Jessie. (He pushed her shoulder very rudely) Can I join you?
(Jessie didn't say a word, and Bill just sat down)
Bill: Wow! Wow! Wow! You are wearing a nice dress today!
Jessie: Thanks!
Bill: Oh! What a beautiful hair clip. Where did you buy it?
(Jessie didn't say anything..)
Bill: Hey, you have a nice watch.
(He held her hand strongly and Jessie got angry.)
Jessie: Don't touch me! I don't want to talk to you. Leave me alone!
(Bill stood up and walked toward Carol.
Bill sat down beside Carol without asking her)
Bill: Hey, beautiful! How could you eat so little! It's not good for your health! Take this!
(Bill wanted Carol to eat his food)
Carol: No.
Bill: Take it! (He was very rude and the plate fell down.)
Carol: Hey! What are you doing! This is my new skirt!
Bill: I'm sorry!
Carol: Go away! You're such a rude guy!
(Carol went away.)
Bill: Did I do something wrong?
(He talked to himself)
Scene II
(In Hillary's room. Hillary was surfing the net)
Bill: Sis....
Bill: Hillary!
Hillary: Oh! Hi! Bill! How long have you been sitting there? Are you trying to scare me?
(Bill didn't say a word.)
Hillary: Bill? What's wrong with you? What happened?
Bill: I tried to draw some girls' attention but they just ignored me!
Hillary: Hmm....Maybe the way you used was wrong.
Bill: Yeah, maybe. But I don't know how to attract them. Hillary, I just want to have a girlfriend?
Hillary: Girlfriend?
Bill: Yeah.
Hillary: Let me see what I can do.
Bill: So, can you help me?
Hillary: Ok! Since you really want to have a girlfriend, I'll try to help you.
Bill: Great! Thank you! You are a doll!
(At this moment, Hillary's net-friend is calling her.)
Hillary: Oh.. My net-friend!
Bill: Ok! Waiting for your good news!
(Bill left Hillary's room and Hillary was thinking how she helped Bill.)
Hillary: Yeah! That's it! I can pretend to be Bill and find a girlfriend on the Internet!
(She opened the PC and saw a girl's name "Monica"...)
Hillary: (Laughing......) Monica!
(A little bit surprised)
Hillary: (Talked to herself) It is the same name as the girl of Clinton's sexual scandal. Hmm. Let me send a message to her.
Hillary: Hi! I'm Bill! Glad to meet you!
Monica: Hello, Bill! , Glad to meet you, too. I'm a college student, and you?
Hillary: Me three
Monica: (Laughing...) You're a humorous person!
Hillary: Thanks! I guess you're a female, aren't you?
Monica: Yes, I am.
Hillary: (Talked to herself) Great! She's a girl.
Monica: And you?
Hillary: Oh... I'm a "boy"
Monica: Which school club are you in?
Hillary: Computer Information Club.
Monica: Oh! Really? So you must be a computer expert!
Hillary: You can say that again.
Monica: You know I'm interested in computers, too. So, can you teach me or tell me something about them?
Hillary: Sure! It's my pleasure!
( .....Two hours later .....)
Hillary: Oh! It's interesting to chat with you.
Monica: Yeah! I'm very happy, too.
IIiIIaiy: Will you be here tomorrow? At the same time?
Monica: I think so, I hope we can meet again.
Hillary: Ok, I'll be here tomorrow, Bye! Bye!
Monica: Bye!
Saying: From then on, Monica and Hillary continue chatting with each other after school.
(At Monica's room. As soon as Monica came back home from school,
she started surfing the net. Then, her mom came into her room.
She knocked her door, but no oneanswered the door)
Dad\uff1aDarling\uff0csomeone is knocking the door.
Mom: I'm coming!
Mom: Oh! Monica, my darling! I've just baked some cookies. Want some?
Monica: No, thanks! I have something important to do.
Mom: What are you busy doing?
Monica: I'm surfing the net and talking to my net-friend.
Mom: Net-friends!! They are strangers. You even don't know who they are. I read from the newspapers. Lot's of things happened on net. You should be more careful and you have to watch out for your net-friends, You're so young
Monica: Ok.. ok. .I know, Mom. Don't worry about me.
(Mom walked out her room. and Monica saw Hillary)
Monica: Hello! Bill!
Hillary: Hi! Monica! How's school today?
Monica: Wonderful! It's really a nice day!
Hillary: Monica! I think we've known each other for a long time. And I just wonder whether you would go out with me?
Monica: (Talk to herself) Go out with him?
Monica: Sure, I would like to. I think you're a polite and humorous person. It may be interesting to go out with you!
Hillary: That's great! How about we meeting at McDonald's on Ming-Chang Road this weekend?
Monica: All right! It's a deal! But how can I recognize you?
Hilillary: I'll wear a blue shirt, blue jeans, a blue caps and also carry a blue knapsack. Besides, I'll stand beside the trash can.
Monica: All in blue! Wow! Ok! That will be easy for me to recognize you.
Hillary: Yeah! I'll be waiting for you!
Monica: Ok! See you
Monica: (Talk to herself) Ha! I'm looking forward to it!
Hillary: (Talk to herself) Yes, I made it. I'm going to tell Bill this good news!
ScenceIII
(At McDonald's, Bill was waiting for Monica.
A few minutes later, Monica saw Bill and walked toward Bill)
Monica: Hi... Are you Bill?
Bill: Yes, I am. You're Monica?
Monica: Yeah.. that's right.
Bill: You look great!
Monica: You're not bad, either. Hey, Let's find a table!
Bill: Yeah! How about that one? I've ordered some things.
(They found a table and began talking.)
Monica: Bill!
Bill: Monica!
Bill: Oh! Lady first!
Monica: Bill, have you already finished your computer report?
Bill: Uh...Uh... Did I tell you that?
Monica: Yes, you did. You said it was about how to kill virus. Did you find out how to do that?
Bill: Kill virus? That's easy for me. I'm a genius. Just use a knife.
Monica: A knife?
Bill: Yeah! Knife can kill everything.
Monica: What are you talking about? Alright! Alright! Forget it! And how about the novel we discussed last week?
Bill: Novel? I've read so many novels, which one?
Monica: "The old man and the sea", don't you forget? What happened to that old man?
Bill: Yeah! That old man! He caught a big fish and then became a hero.
Monica: Hmm. He has a strong will, doesn't he? He never gives up anything. And how about the fish?
Bill: Did you forget? He cooked the fish and ate it!
Monica: And~~it's delicious, right?
Bill: You got it! It's very delicious!
Monica: Nonsense! The fish was eaten by the sharks . You're not Bill, are you?
Bill: Of course I'm Bill. "B~I-L-L"
Monica: But you seem different from the way you are on net. Who are you for God's sake?
Bill: Ok. I tell you the truth. I'm Bill, but not the one you talked to on net. That was my sister, Hillary.
Monica: Are you kidding me?
Bill: No, that's true. I really want to have a girlfriend, so she helped me out. She met you on net and thought you're a nice girl. So she arranged us to meet each other.
Monica: That means both of you tricked me?
Bill: So what? That's Hillary's idea.
Monica: You. ..You..... (She is very angry)
Monica: Gosh! I was tricked for such a long time!
Scence IV
(Monica left McDonald angrily)
(At Monica's room, again.)
Monica: (Crying) How foolish I was! What on earth was I doing? (Still crying) I think I need someone to talk to.
(She looked around and saw the time)
Monica: Ah, 8:30. It's "Paula's Time."
(She turned on the TV)
Paula: Welcome to "Paula's Time" I'm Paula Jones, not Dow Jones. Today we'll discuss some net problems. Nowadays Internet helps modern people live more convenient lives, get the latest information. You can say that we live in an Internet world. However, some bad guys made use of Internet to do illegal deals or trick people. So, today we will listen to some friends' problems and help them solve it. Our hot line number is 111-1234. Please dial it as soon as possible. I'm waiting for your call-in. OK. Who's the first friend?
Monica: Hi, Paula, I'm Monica.
Paula: Yes, Monica, what do you want to share with us?
Monica: I met a girl, Hillary, on net three months ago. She pretended to be her brother, Bill, and chatted with me. But I didn't know the truth until yesterday that we arranged to meet each other. He told me that Hillary surfed the net to help him find a girlfriend. And that was me. I felt I was tricked and I was very sad. Do you think I'm wrong?
Paula: It seems like Bill takes special interests in Monica just like our president. Monica, it's a serious and common social problem in modern society. Lots of people want to make friends on the Internet. But you must be careful. On the net, people use nicknames to protect themselves, or even trick others to do something bad. Everyone on the net wears a mask. Sometimes it's evil that hides under the mask. So you had better watch out. Never date with strangers by yourself. Strangers are dangerous.
Monica: Thanks, Paula. You do help me a lot. I know what I should do now.
(Suddenly someone is calling Monica on net)
Starr: Hi! Monica! I'm Starr. May I make friends with you?
Monica: Oh! No! Not again!
(Lights out)
\u5927\u8bdd\u897f\u6e38\u82f1\u6587\u7248\uff0c\u6211\u4eec\u6709\u6f14\u8fc7\uff0c\u641e\u7b11\u53c8\u7cbe\u5f69\uff0c\u53ef\u4ee5\u5230\u7f51\u4e0a\u641c\u5267\u672c
英语小品剧本 -- 孙悟空vs猪八戒
An English play---- Pig Guy has been defeated by Monkey King
悟空：师傅,是不是太累了?休息一下再走吧.
Master, are you tired? Let’s have a rest.
唐僧：没关系,前面不远就有人家了,到了那里再休息吧.
I am fine. Let’s have a rest later. Look! There is a house over there.
悟空仔细地搀扶唐僧继续行走,同时另一边老头、老妈、小媳妇出场.
小媳妇（做哭状）：爹、妈,我……
Daddy, mommy, I, I …
老头：女儿,快走吧,不然那猪精来了,就走不了了.
Honey, hurry up. The spirit is coming soon.
小媳妇走几步又回头跑回老妈的怀里,抱头痛哭.老头在一边叹息,擦泪.
唐僧、悟空走到他们面前.
悟空：师傅,到了.
Master, here we are.
唐僧（走到老头面前行礼,悟空看见了正在哭的母女俩,觉得奇怪,上下打量）：老施主,我是从
东土大唐前往西天取经的和尚,想借贵地休息一晚,不知方便否?
Excuse me, sir. I am the monk from the east. Can we stay over here tonight?
老头（做哽咽状）：哦,是东土大唐来的高僧啊,可以可以.（别过脸去继续哭泣）
Oh, you are the monk from the east. Sure. Sure, come in, please ……
唐僧正在奇怪,老妈闻声抬起头,仔细打量唐僧,突然扑到唐僧面前.
老妈：高僧啊,你可要救救我的女儿,救救我们一家啊.
Master, please save my daughter, save my family…
唐僧：老施主休要伤心,有什么事慢慢说.
Don’t be sad, madam. Take it easy. What happened?
老头：高僧有所不知,我们这里有一只猪精,今天要来跟我女儿成亲,大家都斗不过它,现在正
准备把女儿送出去逃避
Master, there is a spirit here. He wants to marry my daughter, tonight. We are all
afraid of him.
唐僧：施主莫怕,我这徒弟本领高强,也许他能帮上你们.
Calm down, sir. My apprentice has great capability. Maybe, he can help you.
老头：唉,高僧啊,以前也来过自称本领高强的师傅,结果都被这猪精打跑了.今天你们就躲着
别出来了吧.
Alas! , master, there have been many people who boast to be very capable. But every
time, they were defeated by the spirit. You’d better keep away tonight.
悟空：噢,有这么厉害的妖怪?我倒要会他一会.待会你们只管躲起来,外面发生什么事,都不
用管.
What? Is the spirit really so strong? I’d like to see how great he is. All of you
just stay inside. Don’t come out no matter what happens.
这时起了风声（音乐）,老头一家吓得站起来混身发抖.小媳妇吓得直往老妈怀里钻.悟空镇定
地举手示意,让师傅及老头一家人躲到房间里面去.自己也手搭凉篷看了看,便不慌不忙地也躲
在了门后,露出一段红袖子.
猪八戒大笑着耀武扬威地走上场来,嘴里大喊：小娘子,我来了.
Darling, here I am.
站在台上停一下,见没有动静,觉得奇怪,往房屋里看去,见露出一段红袖子,高兴地一拍手掌.
八戒：小娘子还害羞呢,不敢出来见老猪吗?来,来,来,我们就要是夫妻了,还害什么羞呀!.
Darling, don’t be so shy! Please come to me. Come on, we will be a couple.
猪八戒跑上去轻轻拉住红袖子,把小娘子拖了出来,小娘子作出害羞的样子,有时又做出猴子的
模样.
八戒：小娘子,不用怕,我虽然长得丑,但本领高强,一定会让你过上好日子的.
Darling, don’t be afraid. Although I am ugly, I am so powerful. I am sure that I
can make you happy.
小娘子笑着点头,抓耳挠腮.
八戒：小娘子,你高兴的时候干嘛要像猴子一样?
Darling, why do you look like a monkey ?
小娘子：我一高兴就觉得痒,所以就抓一抓.
When I am happy, I always tickle.
八戒：高兴就好,高兴就好.我们快入洞房吧.
Fine, let’s go to the bedroom.
八戒拉住小娘子就往房子里面钻.小娘子作出动脑筋的样子,又把八戒拉回来.
八戒：哇,小娘子,你好大的力气啊,干嘛把我拉出来啊?
Darling. Why are you so powerful?
小娘子：夫君,你这模样进去会吓着我的父母的,还是去你家里吧.
Honey, your appearance will frighten my parents. We’d better go to your home.
八戒：去我家?那太好了,我们这就走吧.
Go to my house?OK. that’s a great idea. Let’s go.
两人走了几步,小女子做出腿疼摔了一下的样子,八戒忙扶起她,作出痛惜的样子.
小女子：我一个弱女子,哪里能走这么远?夫君背我吧.
I cannot walk any further. Can you carry me on your back?
八戒：背你?好,好,好.谁让你是我的媳妇呢?
Carry you on my back? All right. Youre my wife after all. Come on.
八戒把小女子背上：娘子,我们这就出发了.
Darling, Lets go.
小女子（在八戒头上一点）：走吧,呆子.
Okay. Let’s go.
音乐响起(直到八戒摔倒).八戒在台上走一圈,做出越走越慢,越走越累的样子.小女子在他背
上抓耳挠腮,非常高兴.
八戒：小娘子,你怎么这么重啊?
Darling, why are you so heavy?
小女子：不是我重,只怕是你不想背我吧?
Do you think so? Dont you want to carry me?)
八戒：不,不,不,我背,我背.
Yes, I do. I do.
继续艰难地走.小女子得意地在背上笑.八戒体力不支,一跤摔倒,小女子倒地之后,
灵活地越上台上的假山,先做出猴子笑看八戒的样子,再做出摔疼了的样子在那里呻吟.
八戒听到女子的呻吟,忙东张西望找小媳妇.
八戒：娘子,摔着了没有?娘子,摔着了没有?娘子,你摔到哪去了?怎么看不见你了?
Darling, are you OK? Darling, where are you? Why cant I see you?
小女子（偷偷地笑,再装作痛苦的样子）：夫君,我在这里呢.
Honey, I am here.
八戒：哇,娘子, 你怎么摔到高的地方去了?
Darling. Why did you go up there?
小女子：还不是你这呆子害的.
Thats your fault.
八戒：对不起,娘子.对不起,娘子.
Sorry, darling. I’m very sorry.
小女子：看你这么辛苦,我也摔疼了,那就休息休息吧.
You look so tired, and I feel sore. Let’s have a rest.
八戒：太好了. 我们就休息一下吧!
Have a rest? That’s a good idea. Let’s have a rest.
八戒听了高兴地坐在下面休息,小女子仔细地打量他.
小女子（撒娇地）：夫君,你是哪里的神仙,我都还不知道,怎么能嫁给你呢?你可要告诉我.
Honey, how can I marry you? I don’t even know where you come from. You must tell me
the truth first.
八戒：唉,别提了,想当年我本是天上的天篷元帅,上天入地,八面威风.只因冒犯了嫦娥,
被玉帝贬下凡尘,错投了猪胎,长成这般模样.
Alas! Don’t mention it. I was Tianpeng marshal, I could fly between heaven and the
world. Only because I made a big mistake, I was punished by Yudi. So I became a pig.
That’s why I am so ugly.
小女子：亏你长得这么丑,还敢出来见人.
You look too ugly to meet people.
八戒：本来我也不想出来,只是南海观音点化我,叫我在这里等候前往西天的取经人.等了这么久,
也不见,便出来逛逛,能碰到娘子你,是我一生的造化,还管它什么西天取经呢?（八戒高兴地过
去想拉小女子的手）
I didn’t want to come here. Nanhai Guanyin asked me to wait for Tangseng. Ive been
waiting for a long time, but nobody has come. It’s lucky to meet you here.
小女子（把手甩开）：你说自己是天上的神仙,怎么连我都背不动,真让人难以相信.
You said that you were an immortal in the heaven . Why can’t you carry me? It’s
impossible!
八戒：我真的是天上的神仙,你干嘛不信呢你.
I am really the immortal. Why don’t you believe me?
小女子：那你拿出点本事来瞧瞧.
Show me some gongfu then.
八戒：好,让我露两手来给你看看.
OK, let me show you my gongfu.
从石头后拿出钉钯,舞了起来.小女子暗暗点头.当八戒的钉色舞到小女子面前时,被小女子一把
抓住,往石山后面一拖,八戒被拖了过去.
八戒：娘子,你怎么这么大的力气?
Darling. Why are you so strong?
小女子：有本事你把我拖出去呀.
Pull me out if you can .
八戒做出用力拖的样子,没有发现拖出来的却是悟空.悟空一松手,八戒摔倒在地.
八戒：娘子,你怎么这么狠心把我摔倒了? 不要开玩笑了.
How could you let me fall down? Don’t kid any longer.
悟空大笑：呆子,看看我是谁!
You Silly! Look at me. Who am I?
八戒一看,吓得跳起来：齐天大圣,我的妈呀.
My god! You are Mahatma!
八戒转身想跑,被悟空拦住,两人打了起来,八戒不是对手,被悟空压住,不能动弹.
悟空：呆子,你可还敢在这里害人不成?
You silly! Dare you harm others any more?
八戒：不敢了,不敢了.
No, I dare not!
悟空： 你可还敢在这里娶媳妇?
Dare you wive yet?
八戒：不敢了.大圣爷爷饶我.
No,no. Please forgive me, Mahatma.
悟空：量你也不敢.
I bet you dare not.
悟空放开,八戒转身想跑,被悟空一把抓住耳朵,疼得直叫.
悟空：呆子,想往哪里去?
You silly, where are you going?
八戒：我已答应你,不再闹事了,干嘛还不放我走?
Ill never make trouble any more. Why dont you let me go?
悟空：呆子,我带你去见取经人.
You silly, Im taking you to meet the sutra-seeker.
八戒：什么?取经人来了?
What? Has Tangseng come?
悟空：走吧.
Yes. Lets go!
两人在台上走半圈,来到房前.
悟空：师傅,出来吧,这妖怪已经被我降服了.
Master, please come out! The spirit has been defeated !
唐僧等人走了出来,老头一家还有些战战兢兢.
悟空：呆子,还不跪下,见过师傅.
You silly, kneel down to meet your master.
八戒忙对着唐僧下跪,口喊师傅.唐僧非常吃惊.
Master, nice to meet you here.
唐僧：徒儿,这是怎么回事?
My prentice, whats up?
悟空：师傅,这是观世音菩萨特意让他在此等候陪您上西天取经的.
Master, he will accompany you to the west at Guanyins behest.
唐僧：哦,多谢观世音菩萨,既然这样我就收你为徒,赐你法名为
八戒.
I see! Thank Guanyin! Since then, I will take you as my prentice
and name you Bajie.
八戒：谢谢师傅（站了起来）.
Thank you, my master!
老头：恭喜高僧又收神徒.
Congratulations!
唐僧：徒儿们,我们上路吧.（八戒还依依不舍地看着小女子）
Lets go ahead, my prentices.
悟空：八戒,还看什么呢?走了.
Bajie, there is nothing to attach to. Lets go!
八戒恋恋不舍地走到前面带路.
英语小品剧本 -- 孙悟空vs猪八戒
An English play---- Pig Guy has been defeated by Monkey King
悟空：师傅,是不是太累了?休息一下再走吧.
Master, are you tired? Let’s have a rest.
唐僧：没关系,前面不远就有人家了,到了那里再休息吧.
I am fine. Let’s have a rest later. Look! There is a house over there.
悟空仔细地搀扶唐僧继续行走,同时另一边老头、老妈、小媳妇出场.
小媳妇（做哭状）：爹、妈,我……
Daddy, mommy, I, I …
老头：女儿,快走吧,不然那猪精来了,就走不了了.
Honey, hurry up. The spirit is coming soon.
小媳妇走几步又回头跑回老妈的怀里,抱头痛哭.老头在一边叹息,擦泪.
唐僧、悟空走到他们面前.
悟空：师傅,到了.
Master, here we are.
唐僧（走到老头面前行礼,悟空看见了正在哭的母女俩,觉得奇怪,上下打量）：老施主,我是从
东土大唐前往西天取经的和尚,想借贵地休息一晚,不知方便否?
Excuse me, sir. I am the monk from the east. Can we stay over here tonight?
老头（做哽咽状）：哦,是东土大唐来的高僧啊,可以可以.（别过脸去继续哭泣）
Oh, you are the monk from the east. Sure. Sure, come in, please ……
唐僧正在奇怪,老妈闻声抬起头,仔细打量唐僧,突然扑到唐僧面前.
老妈：高僧啊,你可要救救我的女儿,救救我们一家啊.
Master, please save my daughter, save my family…
唐僧：老施主休要伤心,有什么事慢慢说.
Don’t be sad, madam. Take it easy. What happened?
老头：高僧有所不知,我们这里有一只猪精,今天要来跟我女儿成亲,大家都斗不过它,现在正
准备把女儿送出去逃避
Master, there is a spirit here. He wants to marry my daughter, tonight. We are all
afraid of him.
唐僧：施主莫怕,我这徒弟本领高强,也许他能帮上你们.
Calm down, sir. My apprentice has great capability. Maybe, he can help you.
老头：唉,高僧啊,以前也来过自称本领高强的师傅,结果都被这猪精打跑了.今天你们就躲着
别出来了吧.
Alas! , master, there have been many people who boast to be very capable. But every
time, they were defeated by the spirit. You’d better keep away tonight.
悟空：噢,有这么厉害的妖怪?我倒要会他一会.待会你们只管躲起来,外面发生什么事,都不
用管.
What? Is the spirit really so strong? I’d like to see how great he is. All of you
just stay inside. Don’t come out no matter what happens.
这时起了风声（音乐）,老头一家吓得站起来混身发抖.小媳妇吓得直往老妈怀里钻.悟空镇定
地举手示意,让师傅及老头一家人躲到房间里面去.自己也手搭凉篷看了看,便不慌不忙地也躲
在了门后,露出一段红袖子.
猪八戒大笑着耀武扬威地走上场来,嘴里大喊：小娘子,我来了.
Darling, here I am.
站在台上停一下,见没有动静,觉得奇怪,往房屋里看去,见露出一段红袖子,高兴地一拍手掌.
八戒：小娘子还害羞呢,不敢出来见老猪吗?来,来,来,我们就要是夫妻了,还害什么羞呀!.
Darling, don’t be so shy! Please come to me. Come on, we will be a couple.
猪八戒跑上去轻轻拉住红袖子,把小娘子拖了出来,小娘子作出害羞的样子,有时又做出猴子的
模样.
八戒：小娘子,不用怕,我虽然长得丑,但本领高强,一定会让你过上好日子的.
Darling, don’t be afraid. Although I am ugly, I am so powerful. I am sure that I
can make you happy.
小娘子笑着点头,抓耳挠腮.
八戒：小娘子,你高兴的时候干嘛要像猴子一样?
Darling, why do you look like a monkey ?
小娘子：我一高兴就觉得痒,所以就抓一抓.
When I am happy, I always tickle.
八戒：高兴就好,高兴就好.我们快入洞房吧.
Fine, let’s go to the bedroom.
八戒拉住小娘子就往房子里面钻.小娘子作出动脑筋的样子,又把八戒拉回来.
八戒：哇,小娘子,你好大的力气啊,干嘛把我拉出来啊?
Darling. Why are you so powerful?
小娘子：夫君,你这模样进去会吓着我的父母的,还是去你家里吧.
Honey, your appearance will frighten my parents. We’d better go to your home.
八戒：去我家?那太好了,我们这就走吧.
Go to my house?OK. that’s a great idea. Let’s go.
两人走了几步,小女子做出腿疼摔了一下的样子,八戒忙扶起她,作出痛惜的样子.
小女子：我一个弱女子,哪里能走这么远?夫君背我吧.
I cannot walk any further. Can you carry me on your back?
八戒：背你?好,好,好.谁让你是我的媳妇呢?
Carry you on my back? All right. Youre my wife after all. Come on.
八戒把小女子背上：娘子,我们这就出发了.
Darling, Lets go.
小女子（在八戒头上一点）：走吧,呆子.
Okay. Let’s go.
音乐响起(直到八戒摔倒).八戒在台上走一圈,做出越走越慢,越走越累的样子.小女子在他背
上抓耳挠腮,非常高兴.
八戒：小娘子,你怎么这么重啊?
Darling, why are you so heavy?
小女子：不是我重,只怕是你不想背我吧?
Do you think so? Dont you want to carry me?)
八戒：不,不,不,我背,我背.
Yes, I do. I do.
继续艰难地走.小女子得意地在背上笑.八戒体力不支,一跤摔倒,小女子倒地之后,
灵活地越上台上的假山,先做出猴子笑看八戒的样子,再做出摔疼了的样子在那里呻吟.
八戒听到女子的呻吟,忙东张西望找小媳妇.
八戒：娘子,摔着了没有?娘子,摔着了没有?娘子,你摔到哪去了?怎么看不见你了?
Darling, are you OK? Darling, where are you? Why cant I see you?
小女子（偷偷地笑,再装作痛苦的样子）：夫君,我在这里呢.
Honey, I am here.
八戒：哇,娘子, 你怎么摔到高的地方去了?
Darling. Why did you go up there?
小女子：还不是你这呆子害的.
Thats your fault.
八戒：对不起,娘子.对不起,娘子.
Sorry, darling. I’m very sorry.
小女子：看你这么辛苦,我也摔疼了,那就休息休息吧.
You look so tired, and I feel sore. Let’s have a rest.
八戒：太好了. 我们就休息一下吧!
Have a rest? That’s a good idea. Let’s have a rest.
八戒听了高兴地坐在下面休息,小女子仔细地打量他.
小女子（撒娇地）：夫君,你是哪里的神仙,我都还不知道,怎么能嫁给你呢?你可要告诉我.
Honey, how can I marry you? I don’t even know where you come from. You must tell me
the truth first.
八戒：唉,别提了,想当年我本是天上的天篷元帅,上天入地,八面威风.只因冒犯了嫦娥,
被玉帝贬下凡尘,错投了猪胎,长成这般模样.
Alas! Don’t mention it. I was Tianpeng marshal, I could fly between heaven and the
world. Only because I made a big mistake, I was punished by Yudi. So I became a pig.
That’s why I am so ugly.
小女子：亏你长得这么丑,还敢出来见人.
You look too ugly to meet people.
八戒：本来我也不想出来,只是南海观音点化我,叫我在这里等候前往西天的取经人.等了这么久,
也不见,便出来逛逛,能碰到娘子你,是我一生的造化,还管它什么西天取经呢?（八戒高兴地过
去想拉小女子的手）
I didn’t want to come here. Nanhai Guanyin asked me to wait for Tangseng. Ive been
waiting for a long time, but nobody has come. It’s lucky to meet you here.
小女子（把手甩开）：你说自己是天上的神仙,怎么连我都背不动,真让人难以相信.
You said that you were an immortal in the heaven . Why can’t you carry me? It’s
impossible!
八戒：我真的是天上的神仙,你干嘛不信呢你.
I am really the immortal. Why don’t you believe me?
小女子：那你拿出点本事来瞧瞧.
Show me some gongfu then.
八戒：好,让我露两手来给你看看.
OK, let me show you my gongfu.
从石头后拿出钉钯,舞了起来.小女子暗暗点头.当八戒的钉色舞到小女子面前时,被小女子一把
抓住,往石山后面一拖,八戒被拖了过去.
八戒：娘子,你怎么这么大的力气?
Darling. Why are you so strong?
小女子：有本事你把我拖出去呀.
Pull me out if you can .
八戒做出用力拖的样子,没有发现拖出来的却是悟空.悟空一松手,八戒摔倒在地.
八戒：娘子,你怎么这么狠心把我摔倒了? 不要开玩笑了.
How could you let me fall down? Don’t kid any longer.
悟空大笑：呆子,看看我是谁!
You Silly! Look at me. Who am I?
八戒一看,吓得跳起来：齐天大圣,我的妈呀.
My god! You are Mahatma!
八戒转身想跑,被悟空拦住,两人打了起来,八戒不是对手,被悟空压住,不能动弹.
悟空：呆子,你可还敢在这里害人不成?
You silly! Dare you harm others any more?
八戒：不敢了,不敢了.
No, I dare not!
悟空： 你可还敢在这里娶媳妇?
Dare you wive yet?
八戒：不敢了.大圣爷爷饶我.
No,no. Please forgive me, Mahatma.
悟空：量你也不敢.
I bet you dare not.
悟空放开,八戒转身想跑,被悟空一把抓住耳朵,疼得直叫.
悟空：呆子,想往哪里去?
You silly, where are you going?
八戒：我已答应你,不再闹事了,干嘛还不放我走?
Ill never make trouble any more. Why dont you let me go?
悟空：呆子,我带你去见取经人.
You silly, Im taking you to meet the sutra-seeker.
八戒：什么?取经人来了?
What? Has Tangseng come?
悟空：走吧.
Yes. Lets go!
两人在台上走半圈,来到房前.
悟空：师傅,出来吧,这妖怪已经被我降服了.
Master, please come out! The spirit has been defeated !
唐僧等人走了出来,老头一家还有些战战兢兢.
悟空：呆子,还不跪下,见过师傅.
You silly, kneel down to meet your master.
八戒忙对着唐僧下跪,口喊师傅.唐僧非常吃惊.
Master, nice to meet you here.
唐僧：徒儿,这是怎么回事?
My prentice, whats up?
悟空：师傅,这是观世音菩萨特意让他在此等候陪您上西天取经的.
Master, he will accompany you to the west at Guanyins behest.
唐僧：哦,多谢观世音菩萨,既然这样我就收你为徒,赐你法名为
八戒.
I see! Thank Guanyin! Since then, I will take you as my prentice
and name you Bajie.
八戒：谢谢师傅（站了起来）.
Thank you, my master!
老头：恭喜高僧又收神徒.
Congratulations!
唐僧：徒儿们,我们上路吧.（八戒还依依不舍地看着小女子）
Lets go ahead, my prentices.
悟空：八戒,还看什么呢?走了.
Bajie, there is nothing to attach to. Lets go!
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绛旓細灏忔儏姝 娌炬按 灏忚嫻鏋 骞垮満鑸 浜哄悕骞垮満
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绛旓細涓,涓嶃傜幇鍦ㄤ粈涔堥兘甯笉浜嗐 Cinderella: You see, I have the other slipper. 浣犵湅,鎴戞湁鍙︿竴鍙嫋闉嬨 Cinderella and the prince held a grand wedding and they led a happy life from then on. 鐜嬪瓙鍜岀伆濮戝涓捐浜嗙洓澶х殑濠氱ぜ,骞哥鍦扮敓娲汇 <<鐏板濞>>鍓ф湰鑻辨枃鐗: 绗竴鍦: 鏃佺櫧:Long, long ago, ...
绛旓細j:Lunch is my wife! we haven鈥檛 got divorced yet!(绐佺劧鏈変簡涓绘剰)Oh!you are going to rob the wedding, don鈥檛 you? i鈥檒l go with you. you take the money and i take the bride.b:have you got any experience?j:no. but i鈥檝e got this!(j鑴变笅闉嬪瓙浠庨噷闈㈡懜鍑轰竴寮犳敮绁紝...
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